The Attempted Coup

What’s going on, internet world?  Anything interesting happen in the last couple months since the election?  I’m sure it was quiet, right?


Oh, fuck.

So here’s the short, short version.  After everyone who is not trapped in the RWM Echo Chamber realized that Joe Biden beat the shit out of Donald Trump, good ole Adolf Twittler screamed about fraud, stolen elections, bad counting, and inciting violence.  MAGA challenged the results of Arizona, Pennsylvania, Wisconsin, Michigan and Georgia repeatedly.  After going 1-70 in like 71 court cases and losing each and every recount, Cult45 doubled down on the crazy, convincing themselves that there must be some massive conspiracy against them involving stolen ballots, shredded papers, chem trails, and whatever the fuck else they believe in.  I’m not completely sure, most of my MAGA Facebook friends went to Parler.  Good, fuck’em.

Well, last night was the Georgia Senate Run-off, and both Democrats won.  But that’s another story that ends with the Democrats controlling the Senate.

In the last few weeks, a bunch of MAGA-Lite politicians have tried to tap into the barely literate mob for their own purposes.  This includes about 70 House members and Senators Hawley from Missouri and Ted Cruz.  After today, their names need to go down in history with Benedict Arnold and Judas.  That’s how bad things went today.

I guess I should talk about what happened.  It was a two-front assault on Democracy.

On the civil front, a few dozen self-serving Republicans decided to drag out the certification process of the Electoral College’s vote.  This was after a last-ditch effort by them to have Mike Pence bypass the results and just anoint Trump the winner.  In what could best be described as the stupidest argument since my kid argued for cupcakes for breakfast since they’re shaped like muffins, Representatives like Goehmert argued that the Vice President doesn’t have to read the actual results as they were certified by the EC and laid out in the Constitution, but could just read what he felt like. Yeah, that fucking stupid.  Anyway, these ambitious dipshits decided that they would work together in both houses of Congress to delay the certification by lodging challenges to each state that Biden won in 2020 but Trump lost based off of even worse logic and disingenuous arguments.  They got to Arizona, when the shit show started.

Now on to the not-so-civil shit.

Down the street, Trump hosted the “Stop the Steal” rally, where he instructed about a thousand of his most crazy cult members.  The Snowflake-In-Chief had his feelings hurt when Pence said he wasn’t going to try to start a coup to maintain their positions.  So Trump told the crowd to march down to the Capitol and show them what you think.

Fast forward about an hour or two, and this group of maybe 1500 white nationalist terrorists breech the perimeter of the Capitol, break down the doors, and invade the building.  Shots were fired while the joint session of Congress was in session and the Capital Police (yes, different spellings because reasons) let the terrorists in.

Yes, they let them in.  Some even took selfies with the mob.

This mob trashed the building, stole shit, smashed windows, and attacked people.  Congresspeople and press were evacuated, and one member of Cult45 was shot and killed.  I don’t cry for terrorists.

This mob wrecked the Capitol with the main purpose of preventing Congress from certifying Joe Biden’s win.  And wrecking shit.  And killing Libs.

One traitor was killed, and the FBI diffused at least two bombs.  A pipe bomb was dropped off at RNC HQ, and the DNC HQ was evacuated.

Everyone with even a semblance of a conscience called this what it was: an insurrection.  Trump praised them and called them patriots. 

This was an attempt at a coup.  

The National Guard wasn’t deployed until Pence returned to the White House.  Twitter suspended Trump’s account, there have been some immediate resignations in the White House including Melania’s Chief of Staff, some of the objections have been withdrawn, and that’s just for starters.  The talk for most of the day has been “Impeach and Remove” and “Invoke the 25th.”  The list of names calling for these actions is too long to list but includes all the heavy hitters in the Democratic Party and more than a few Republicans.  I’ve gone over how the 25th works in Hypotheticals, so no need to go over that.  As far as impeachment and conviction go, a resolution can be brought to the floor of the House right away (after the certification of the Electoral College business) and receive an Up or Down vote right away.  It would be nice to have the charges read into the record, but not completely necessary.  At that point the bill can be taken to the Senate where a trial should take place, but we saw how that worked last year.  At this point, 16 Republicans would need to join the 50 Democrats (after the Georgia senators are sworn in shortly) to vote to remove Trump from office and to bar him from ever holding office again.

There needs to be consequences.  Big fucking consequences.  Like, death penalty charges and 20 years to life sentences for members of the crowd and Trump dying alone in prison.  If not, then this shit will only get worse.


Thank you and… wait, what?


Just as I was about to sign off and enjoy some AEW, CBS News is reporting that the Cabinet and Pence are discussing invoking Article IV of the 25th Amendment, and it’s not so much a ‘should they’ conversation but a ‘how do we do it’ conversation.  That’s interesting.


Thank you and have a good one.

Election 2020 Part 5

Election 2020, Part 4 went up a couple days ago, and then it looked like it was all over but the crying.

BIDEN WINS!!!!!!!!!!!   BIDEN WINS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Joseph Robinette Biden, Jr. will become the 46th President of the United States of America.

Joseph Robinette Biden, Jr. will become the 46th President of the United States of America. Senator Kamala Harris of California will become the first female Vice President.

I cried. I’m on the verge of tears right now as I write this, over two hours after the news broke. I’m..happy.

But by no means is the fight done. Not by a long shot. As Jean-Luc Picard said “The price of Liberty is Eternal Vigilance.” We came too close this time to slip into fascism to sit on our laurels.

I will stay in the fight for liberty until my dying days, and I can ensure that my children and their children have taken up the mantle. For now, this weekend is cause for celebration.

Trump has not conceded, nor does anyone expect him to. He’s too much of a chickenshit narcissist to do so. He will call for violence at some point soon. How many take up the call, that’s the question.

There is a lot we have to do moving forward to save this country. But tonight. Just tonight. I’m standing down.

That, and I want to get fucking shitfaced and watch wrestling. This Yinzer deserves a night off. You know, after saving the Republic and all.

Thank you, and have a good one.

Election 2020, Part 4

Hello once again.  It’s Friday, November 6th.  It’s been a couple days since the last post, Election 2020 Part 3.  What’s going on and where do we stand?

Annotation 2020-11-06 095154

That’s where! Over the last few days, mail-in votes were counted in Pennsylvania. Trump’s lead of nearly two million votes evaporated as the mail-ins were counted. Joe Biden now leads by about 5,500 votes, with about 100,000 left to count. The mail-in vote has been heavily Democratic.


Remember how Orange Julius spent the last few months claiming that COVID was a hoax and that mail voting was a fraud? Well, the Democrats are the people that listened to scientists, and decided that instead of spending all day standing in line with some mouth breathers who want to bitch about ‘muh freedum’, if they had the option to vote by mail, they did. My wife and I received our ballots in early October, held on to them for about 3 days, then mailed them in. They were received and recorded a few weeks ago, but couldn’t be counted until the polls closed.

Also, see how Georgia is slightly blue? JOE BIDEN IS LEADING IN GEORGIA! It’s a narrow lead, and will almost certainly go to a recount, but Georgia could flip for Joe.

Nevada has about 190,000 ballots left to announce. They are all mail-in ballots, and 90% of them are from Clark County, the home of Las Vegas.

Joe’s lead in Arizona is narrowing, but Trump would have to greatly outperform what he’s been doing to take the state. Even still, if…I’m sorry, WHEN Pennsylvania is called for Biden, it’s all over but the crying.

PA, NV, and GA would give Biden 295 electoral votes, taking Arizona out of the mix. Add it back in, and he hits 306.

Same as Trump in 2016. Irony can be pretty ironic sometimes.

Now, I’m going to sit back, watch the counts, and see what happens. At this point it’s about padding the lead in PA. Soon it will pass the point where the number of votes left are outweighed by the margin. That might take a few hours. Once that happens, expect the Associated Press to project Joe Biden as the winner and next President of the United States of America.

And expect the biggest temper tantrum in this country’s history as Donald Trump completely loses his shit.

Election 2020 Part 3

I’m back. It was easier to make a new post than it was to edit the one from earlier.

It’s 6:45PM on Wednesday, November 4th. Here’s where we’re at…

In the last few hours, Michigan and Wisconsin were both called for Biden. The margins are greater than what Trump won with back in 2016. Pennsylvania still has about a million votes left to count, mostly from Philadelphia and Pittsburgh. We still won’t have a count for them until at least Thursday or Friday. Nevada still has yet to be called, but they are scheduled to announce more results later tonight at 8PM EST/5PM PST. North Carolina and Georgia are still too close to call, with Georgia processing mail-in votes for Atlanta.

The current total is 264-214, based on the projections. Any single win for Biden give him the Presidency.


Nevada just said no news tonight. It’s hard to get numbers nailed down on it, but I’m still hopeful across the board.

Look at it from the GOP perspective. Everything except Nevada is a loss, but Trump could afford to lose 36 EV’s and still win. Arizona, Wisconsin, and Michigan are 37 votes. Nebraska-2 makes it 38. The only state they had a chance to flip was Nevada, which would give them a buffer of 6 votes, making the count 276-264 if Trump holds everything.

Here’s the rub, though. Remember how Trump went all gung-ho on claiming that mail-in voting was a fraud, was bad, and convinced all of Cult45 to wait until yesterday to vote? Well, the Democrats took advantage of pants-optional voting and sent in millions of ballots. It’s hard to get a specific number, but the mail-in votes across the board leaned heavily towards Biden, like 70-30. That skewed even higher in Democratic areas like major cities. So, for every 10 votes cast, 4 of them either padded Joe’s lead, or chipped away at Trump’s lead. Georgia has Trump leading by 75,000 votes. With a 70-30 split, Biden would need about 200,000 votes from a heavy blue area to take the lead. That’s where we’re at, assuming that’s what is left.

It’s sort of like protecting a lead, except Kyle Shanahan is calling the plays on offense. At this point all Trump can do is whine, bitch, and wait.

I don’t think we’ll get an answer tonight, unless Georgia or North Carolina make large strides tonight. But Trump and the Republicans have just filed another lawsuit in Georgia to force them to stop counting ballots. All they’ve got left are lawsuits at this point.

Trump needs to run the table on Nevada, Pennsylvania, North Carolina, and Georgia. Hell, Alaska could be up for grabs if we’re looking at it that way. Considering that Nevada just passed a gay marriage amendment to their state constitution via a 61-39 margin, I’m feeling a little more positive every day.

It might be another day or two until we get an answer. The question becomes “are there enough mail-in ballots in the remaining states to give Biden a win any one of them?”

Stay frosty out there.